According to the Angel Soft ad that keeps popping up in my Facebook feed, today is National Single Parent Day. A quick Google search shows me this is a real thing signed into being by Ronald Reagan (!). I’m not trying to get political but I’m surprised that the person who helped propagate the welfare queen myth actually did something positive for single parents. But I have gotten political, so pardon the digression.
Anyway, I wasn’t planning to post about being a single parent, though to be fair, every post I post about being a mother is about being a single parent. However, my daughter and I had an interesting discussion tonight, which was a true adventure in parenting.
As previously mentioned, my daughter turned 18 a few weeks ago. Since then, she has been itching for more freedom. This all came to a head last night when she told me she thought it would be best if she move out. There is a lot of backstory here that I won’t get into because most of it is her story and not mine, but the final conclusion was that she didn’t want to actually move out: she wanted to experience what it was like to be a grown-up without having to move out. In short, she wanted to try out a roommate situation to prepare her for college, which meant more financial responsibility and more freedom (i.e., no curfew).
So tonight we talked about money, and I showed her what bills (or parts of bills) she would be responsible for. In the end, she said, “I changed my mind. I want to keep being a kid.” And then she asked me if I was going to blog about it for my slice of life post today.
As of this posting, I still have a daughter and not a roommate. But I also have a child who understands a little bit more about what it means to be a grown-up.
I’m sitting here trying to think of what to write about, and all I can think is that I’m going to lose an hour of sleep and that I actually have to finish grading tomorrow. VACATION’S OVER.
(To be fair, I love Daylight Saving Time–I just hate that it always falls at the end of my spring break. RUDE.)
Anyway, here is an exchange I had with my daughter tonight. The background is that she wanted to get slippers. This turned into an unfruitful trip to TJ Maxx, followed by a fruitful trip to Rack Room Shoes and Target. Even though I told her I got my slippers from Burlington, she heard TJ Maxx, so we were there for less than five minutes before she realized the error. Target is closer to TJ Maxx than Burlington is so I suggested we head there first. She decided to detour into Rack Room before going to Target (they’re right next to each other), so then, we left Target and got into the car.
Her: We should just go home. I’m tired.
Me: No, you want slippers. Let’s just get the slippers.
Her: I’m tired.
Me: You’ll be happy you got it out of the way.
Her: If I’m driving, I’m going home. (Obvs, since she was the one who wanted to go to the store, she had to drive.)
Me: No, go to Burlington. I’ll drive home.
Her: I’m just so tired.
Me: I’ll drive home. It’s fine.
She drives to Burlington and barely sings a single song on the way there.
Me: Wow, you really are tired.
Her: I told you.
Go to Burlington, get the slippers. Leave Burlington. She complains about how she was tired and could have waited until tomorrow. Then, she wouldn’t have felt so rushed. Blah blah complain blah she’s so tired blah.
Get home. (Do you already know where this is going? I’m sure you know where this is going.)
Her: My friends are at Steak ‘n Shake. Can I go?
Me: I thought you were SO TIRED. Remember how TIRED you said you were. ‘Oh, I’m SO TIRED. I think I’m going to DIE because I’m SO TIRED.’ Remember?
Her: I’m home now, so I feel better. Plus, I’m an extrovert. Being around my friends will give me energy.
Me: But how will you drive when you’re SO TIRED?
This went on for a while (until she left the house, basically). I never claimed to be mature.
My daughter turned 18 today (yesterday technically–again with the midnight posting), and this birthday has been interesting to say the least.
The original plan was to go to New York to see Hamilton, but that proved too expensive so I had to sell the tickets/cancel the trip. (This was all my daughter’s suggestion, btw. She said she would rather use the money for her college deposit AND she could see that trying to figure out the money for the trip was stressing me out. Sometimes she’s not selfish [her words].)
Then, my daughter kind of realized that what was supposed to be this epic New York trip to celebrate her birthday was going to be a day in our small town with a lot of her friends out of town for spring break. Also, trying to pull something together at the last minute was, you know, trying to pull something together at the last minute. Plus also, one of her friends that she really wanted to hang out with texted her this afternoon to tell her she had just gotten back from the ER and has the flu that’s been going around.
I kept asking her what she wanted to do, and she kept saying she didn’t know. Then, this exchange happened:
Her: Olive Garden?
Me: You want to go to Olive Garden?
Her: I don’t know. Is that too basic?
Me: Is it? It’s your birthday. Is that what you want?
Her: We should go to IHOP.
Me: [laughs] IHOP?
Me: You went from Olive Garden being basic to IHOP.
Her: What’s wrong with IHOP?
Me: Nothing! It’s your birthday! It’s just funny.
Her: I just really want some pancakes.
So we went to IHOP for brunch with my parents, and then she went shopping/hung out with some of her friends who are still in town for the rest of the day.
She also asked me to make her a blue cake because Percy Jackson.
So, you know. Interesting. And not at all what we originally planned.
My daughter got into her dream school, and today was Admitted Students Day.
This morning as she was getting ready, she asked me about her outfit choice. I told her it was fine but asked if she really wanted to wear a skirt.
Me: We’ll be doing a lot of walking. You might be uncomfortable.
Her: Skirts are way more comfortable for walking than pants.
Me: Oh, that’s right. I forgot your thighs don’t rub together.
The best part was that the VERY IDEA was so foreign to her that she asked a lot of follow up questions, which meant I had to explain chafing and ways to prevent it to her.
I think she also understood then why I was wearing leggings under my dress.
As for the leggings, I got a lot of compliments on them (they’re cute!) but my daughter said that because of the cut of my dress, I looked like I had skipped leg day at the gym.
So I was all set to write about how my vow to never cook again lasted less than 24 hours because I found a recipe for crockpot chicken and decided to use it. (Spoiler alert: it was terrible.) But my daughter got grounded yesterday (full grounding: no electronics, no TV, stay in your room), and she is so miserable that it is hilarious.
I don’t mean to be mean but since I got home, she:
– told me she was so bored and begged me to please not make her go upstairs
– went upstairs in a huff
– came back downstairs to make tea
– told me she couldn’t go upstairs with her tea because it had sugar in it, and she doesn’t want to get ants in her room
– asked me if I had a good day and when I said yes told me that was “too bad”
– apologized profusely and said she was just joking and please omg don’t make her go upstairs she has to finish her tea she’s so sorry
– asked me what she was supposed to do with herself since there’s nothing to do
– told me she didn’t have any books when I suggested she use the time to read even though there are more than three full bookshelves in the office
– asked me if I was making her stay in her room because she’s in trouble and I can’t stand to see her face
– got upset when I told her that no, it’s just that part of her punishment is being upstairs and if she’s downstairs that means she’s not serving her punishment
– went upstairs in a huff when I told her she had stalled long enough
– came back downstairs to wash her face in the downstairs bathroom since her toothbrush is down here so she might as well do everything down here (I need to buy more toothpaste, or her toothpaste would be upstairs)
– went upstairs briefly
– came back downstairs to gather the books she had checked out from the library and made a point to tell me that’s what she was doing
– went back upstairs
I wonder how long she’ll stay up there this time. 😂😂😂